Ace in the Face!

Best victory dance ever! Ping Pong kicks footballs ass (I can't believe I just said that...). Case and point below.

Football

Ping Pong

See more funny videos and funny pictures at CollegeHumor.

A Sushi Experience

For my last dinner in LA possibly ever (just joking...probably) I went to a traditional Japanese sushi restaurant. It's not the easiest place to find. Like their website says, It "is nestled below a Chevrolet truck billboard, and next to a larger building. There is no name on the restaurant, just a sign with the outline of a black fish." I'm not sure how my parents originally found this place but I'm happy they did. There's only 8 tables in the entire restaurant and the sushi bar also only seats 8. It's called Mori, the name of the sushi chef. He favors traditional Japanese style sushi instead of the Americanized spicy tuna rolls and orgasm roles. I didn't want to offend his palate so I went with a traditional Omakasa sushi and sashimi dinner. I have no clue what the literal translation is, so don't ask. What I do know is that the sushi chef gets to choose what he considers a culinary adventure and just brings keeps stuff coming to the table.

The meal started with monk fish lips. I'm not going to lie, i was a little skeptical. It's a pretty scary (and gnarly) way to start a dinner. It was raw and slightly brown colored but hearty and surprisingly tasty. I'm not recommending that you run out and try it immediately but if it somehow falls in your lap (bizarre way to put it) i would definitely try it. In case you were wondering because I know i was, here's a picture of the lovely and very friendly looking monk fish. I had no idea it looked like this. It makes me feel a little manlier knowing that i devoured this sea beast.

The rest of the meal was much tamer. It covered most of the traditional Japanese sushi stops. There was the hamachi and Toro. Some squid and giant clams. Some halibut and wild salmon. All of it tasted like it came fresh from the ocean which was wonderful. The meal ended with the bizarre Japanese tradition of a jiggly sweet desert dish that's almost always disgusting. This didn't disappoint. This was a blood orange custard in a blood orange peal. I would have preferred a real blood orange...

http://www.morisushi.org/

It's just Grammar

A Great Quote...Think about it

Cause Change and Lead

Accept Change and Survive

Resist Change and Die

- Ray Norda, Chairman, Novell

Auto Bailout

A recent USA Today poll shows that only 25% of Americans support an auto industry bailout. Put another way (actually the exact same but I feel it's more forceful): 75% of Americans Don't want their tax dollars going to the auto industry. If that's the case then why are our representatives in Washington still considering ANOTHER bailout? GM is expected to post record losses again, somewhere around 8 billion for Q4. (UPDATE: GM just reported losses for 2008, get ready for this...at 30.9 billion!) Apparently the original 15 billion we gave them a couple months ago wasn't enough. GM and Chrysler are in Washington (again) asking for more money. They decided to leave the private jets at home (good decision guys!). These guys live such a hard life...They use the threat of bankruptcy and the loss of more jobs to try to coerce our representatives into giving them additional funds. I believe they are missing the big picture. The only way for the auto industry to achieve a sustainable business plan is for them to file for bankruptcy. Yes, I'm talking about the big bad "B" word. It's the only way for them to break the unions. The same unions that would rather see an entire industry fail instead of renegotiating contracts to make them competitive with the rest of the world. If the contracts don't change we will be stuck in a vicious cycle of a bailout followed by a bailout followed by another trip to Washington and then another bailout. I call it a bailout, they call it a loan. Either way, I pay taxes and then those tax dollars are given to a failing industry. Think about it, it's not very complex. If i have to pay 10 dollars to make something and you only have to pay 8 dollars and we each have identical products then who has the competitive advantage? Ding, ding, ding. We have a winner and it's not the US!

So why don't the people in Washington do what I thought they were supposed to do and represent the people who elected them. It's funny that they are called "representatives" but so often they do no representing.

Let's guarantee the warranties of American made cars and get the auto industries into some sort of structured bankruptcy. Let's crush the auto unions and make our auto industry competitive with the rest of the world. And, in the end if they still aren't competitive then we should let them fail. Our country has prospered with competitive capitalism. It's not always the prettiest or nicest way to run a society but it seems to have worked better than the others. Winston Churchill put it brilliantly, "Capitalism is surely the worst economic system, except for all the others that have been tried."

The best of the Internet

The internet is truly amazing. Where else could millions of people watch pointless videos that serve no purpose other than to make us laugh. Time magazine wrote an article about a list put together by Greg Rutter (confusing, i know) of the best viral videos on the net. Here's a link to his website in case you missed it.

I'm particularly fond of the first video (grape stomping), #78 Techno Viking (so bizarre it's awesome; crazy Europeans) and #69 Hitler Plans Burning Man (very very creative).

http://www.youshouldhaveseenthis.com/

LA is not for ME

It's official. I will never move back to LA. I can't stand it here. Well, let me explain that one a little. I love the city for what it is. There are some great restaurants and beautiful sights to see. I love knowing that the beach is there and that it opens up to a vast ocean of nothingness. I love the diversity and eclectic nature of the city. The Ghetty museum is a great place to spend the afternoon. I mean, what museum can you spend an entire day at without even seeing a single piece of art and still have a great time? There's just a small problem. This city isn't big enough for the two of us...

There is a fight almost every fucking day with her. What's it over?!?! I have no clue. The outbursts just erupt and escalate. It's like someone injects us with supercharged rocket fuel and lights a match. There's always a leaking gas tank and I'm smoking a cigarette completely unaware of the dangers. The spark can come from a wrong turn to dinner or taking too long to get ready. It can come from parking in the driveway which seems pretty harmless to me but it's not. Who is this person? None other than my loving and caring mom.

I wouldn't consider our relationship terrible; that is when I'm living over a thousand miles away in Colorado. The phone calls are almost always civil. She cares what's going on in my life and I'm interested in hers. But there is something that happens when i step off the plane at LAX. It's like there's something in the air (or maybe that's just the smog).

I knew this trip would be bad. She retired a week ago which meant lots of free time. Most would be excited for the chance to spend countless hours with their mom. Shopping, eating out at restaurants or taking a walks would be enjoyed by most but not me. It's like walking on egg shells over here. Agreeing to do any activity with this woman is like walking into a mine field. It's not like there's a 99 percent chance of survival it's the exact opposite. There's only a 1 freaking percent chance that your going to walk away from it. There's no chance of survival. You need to learn how to maneuver yourself. The only problem is that I'm 25 years old and still haven't figured this game out.

So, here I am. It's 11:00 AM on a Wednesday. It's minutes after a blowup. We were supposed to eat breakfast together but we are both being stubborn. She's upstairs and I'm downstairs. Neither of us are eating. I'm hungry but would never admit it and I'm sure she's thinking the same thing. Should I go upstairs and apologize? It would probably be the right thing to do but I'm not.

She tells me that I should be a nicer person. It's a pretty blanket statement that needs more explaining but I get none. What does it really mean to be "nicer?" What a vague word to use to describe someone. Disingenuous, dishonest, immoral, lacking drive or ambition, heartless, thankless, greedy...the list could go on and on. These are all words that mean something. But "nicer"? Really? That's the word you would use to describe me? And the crazy part is that I do try to be nice to people. I try to be nice to both friends and strangers. (maybe I'm wrong and someone should tell me! In fact, if you read this and think I should be nicer please tell me and i will apologize to both you and my mom). I'm not so naive to think that I haven't ever been mean or done wrong. That would be a blatant lie. But I always try to learn from my mistakes and grow. I guess that's the goal in life. It's impossible to do no wrong but it's foolish to not learn from it.

So, back to the point. I'm in LA and I would like to consider this a vacation but it's far from it. I'm stuck in limbo trying to balance seeing my friends, relaxing and spending time with the parents. I'm on day 5 of this "really fun" trip and can't wait to get back to the relative calm of Colorado. I appreciate Denver more and more every time I leave. It makes me second guess leaving for graduate school. But do i really love the city for what it has to offer or do i love it for what it doesn't have?

I wonder if she's going to read this...

The Sweet Nectar

The graph below shows quarterly change in liquor store sales and quarterly change in GDP over the last half century.  As you can see there is no correlation between economic growth and the amount of booze we buy for home consumption. 

fivethirtyeight.com

This was pretty shocking to me.  I expected to see a rise in liquor store sales as people transitioned away from drinking at bars (more expensive) for the cheaper alternative of home drinking.  I certainly didn't expect good 'ol Americans to stop drinking I just assumed we would shift our drinking to a cheaper alternative.  In fact, i assumed that people would increase their drinking as economic times deteriorated. 

Ladies and gentlemen, we are in the midst of the largest decrease in at home liquor consumption on record.  This 9 percent drop is almost three times bigger than the next major drop seen in 1991.  I can not be held responsible for that drop considering i was only 8 years old at the time.  But now i can help and I am committed but I need your help.  It is up to you to go to your local store and spend some of that stimulus package money on beer, wine or hard alcohol.  Invite your friends over and make it your goal to drink an entire 24 pack.  If there's more than 4 of you double it and make it two cases!  It's the least and i mean least you can do to help turn the economy around.  But don't forget to drink American which means stay away from some of the old American classics like Miller Lite, Miller Genuine Draft, Olde English 800, Milwaukee’s Best, Mickey's and Shithouse ( sorry, i meant Icehouse) which are all made by SABMiller (South African Breweries) a South African company which purchased Miller from Altria in 2002.  The recent purchase of Anheiser Busch by InBev sends all Budweiser, Busch and Mechelob beer profits to Belgium and Brazil.  Finally, there's Coors which is now connected to Molson which is a Canadian company.  It's hard to claim it as a "true" American brewery anymore.  All this makes it very confusing when trying to stimulate OUR economy.  There's always the safe Pabst Blue Ribbon which was so proud (and probably shocked) to win anything they named their beer after it.  Besides, when was the last time something won a ribbon?!?!  

 

Impressively Offensive

How's this for the most inappropriate political cartoon!  And here's the kicker, it was published in the New York Post.  How did this possibly get past the editors of the newspaper?  I'm not crazy, it's definitely comparing Obama to a chimpanzee which is terribly offensive from a racial perspective but it manages to take it a step further.  The chimp is dead!  Well, actually the chimp was killed!  I'm not one to sensor people but this seems to be going a little too far.  

Just what we needed...Rev. Al Sharpton decided to chime in (no shocker there).

"The cartoon in today's New York Post is troubling at best given the historic racist attacks of African-Americans as being synonymous with monkeys. One has to question whether the cartoonist is making a less than casual reference to this when in the cartoon they have police saying after shooting a chimpanzee that "Now they will have to find someone else to write the stimulus bill."

"Being that the stimulus bill has been the first legislative victory of President Barack Obama (the first African American president) and has become synonymous with him it is not a reach to wonder are they inferring that a monkey wrote the last bill?"

Sirius XM - the struggle continues

Surius XM managed to find a lender today.  Their stock jumped to a whopping 16 cents (cents not dollars).  It's nothing to write home about and their struggles are far from over but it was a 60 percent jump.  Do you think pay-for-radio is a feasible idea?  Do you consider it any different than cable TV?  I added a little survey on the side column to get a feel for you propensity to pay for radio.  The sound quality is better and i would also argue that the content is better.  You're only stuck with the Billboard top 50 on repeat if you want it.  

Animal Pictures

For no reason at all, here are some animal pictures.

http://www.flickr.com/people/floridapfe/

http://1x.com/member/9711/leon-baas/

http://pixdaus.com/single.php?id=42558

http://www.flickr.com/people/bbmaui/

The Great San Francisco Pillow Fight

When I was younger the idea of having a HUGE pillow fight sounded incredible.  All right, maybe it was only a couple weeks ago.  I had no idea that San Francisco made it a reality.  Follow the link and take a look at the pictures.  1 Point for San Francisco.

“The Great San Francisco Pillow Fight of 2009

It was a cold, wet Valentines night in San Francisco Saturday, but that didn't stop thousands from flocking to Justin Herman Plaza to beat each other senseless with pillows.” Photos by Gretchen Robinette.

http://www.sfweekly.com/slideshow/view/243347/1

Chicken Tequila Fetuccine

For years I went to California Pizza Kitchen and ordered their Chicken Tequila Fettuccine but recently I noticed they were using fewer green, red and yellow peppers.  Besides the great flavors they add, it creates brings a fresh vibrant color to the dish.  I took things into my own hands and started making it at home.  Here's a pretty good recipe.  As with all recipes's don't give up if it doesn't turn out perfectly the first time.  

This is a great recipe to have fun with.  Add extra jalapenos (or leave the seeds in) if you're a fan of heat.  Use a good bottle of tequila so you can take a couple shots or make a margarita while cooking.  I'm a big fan of El Jimador, Cazadores and Herradura.  If your still drinking Jose Cuervo or Montezume then this recipe might not be for you...

INGREDIENTS (Nutrition)

• 1 (16 ounce) package fettuccine pasta - USE SPINACH FETTUCCINE!  It's much better!
• 1/3 cup chopped fresh cilantro
• 2 tablespoons minced garlic
• 2 tablespoons minced jalapeno peppers
• 3 tablespoons butter
• 1/2 cup chicken stock
• 3 tablespoons tequila
• 2 tablespoons fresh lime juice
• 3 tablespoons soy sauce
• 1 1/4 pounds skinless, boneless chicken breast halves - cubed
• 1/4 red onion, sliced
• 1 red bell pepper, thinly sliced
• 1/2 yellow bell pepper, thinly sliced
• 1/2 green bell pepper, sliced
• 1 1/2 cups heavy whipping cream

DIRECTIONS

1. In a medium saucepan, saute the cilantro, garlic and jalapeno pepper in 2 tablespoons of butter or margarine over medium heat for 4 to 5 minutes. Add the stock, tequila and lime juice. Bring the mixture to a boil and cook until reduced to a paste-like consistency. Set aside.
2. Pour soy sauce over the chicken and set aside for 5 minutes. Meanwhile, In a medium sized skillet, saute the onion and the red, green and yellow bell peppers with the remaining tablespoon of butter or margarine, stirring occasionally.
3. Meanwhile, cook fettuccini according to package directions.
4. When the peppers have wilted, add the chicken and soy sauce. Toss and add the reserved tequila/lime paste and cream. Bring to a boil. Gently simmer until chicken is cooked through and sauce is thick. Toss with well drained fettuccini and garnish with cilantro. Serve.
5.  - allrecipes.com

Sopranos

The Sopranos was more than a TV show.  It concluded a weekend and prepared me for the coming week.  There was nothing better than inviting friends over for a classic Italian Sunday dinner.  Spaghetti and wine on a Sunday night while watching everyone's favorite crime family was pure bliss.  Don't get me wrong, I'm a big fan of most of HBO's shows but none of them match the epic nature of the Sopranos.  The wire is a very close second but it's not the same.  Entourage is fun but i wouldn't describe it as epic.  Flight of the Concords is hilarious; if you haven't seen it, watch the first season from start to finish.  I'm a little ashamed to admit it but I even like John from Cincinnati.  I watched the entire first season and have no clue what was going on.  Thanks HBO for canceling the show so now I will never know.

Here's a link to someone's top 20 Soprano's moments...oh the memories.  

http://www.hecklerspray.com/top-20-sopranos-moments-spoilers/200920666.php

Executive Compensation

Here's a quick question...If you're guaranteed a yearly bonus is it really a bonus?  

Robert Nardelli was the CEO of Home Depot for 6 years.  During that time the company lost close to 50% of it's stock value.  Besides paying Nardelli over 30 million a year in compensation, Home Depot agreed to a severance package reportedly worth over 200 million.  Not bad for someone who on all measurable accounts failed.  And here's the kicker, he almost immediately found another job!  He was named the the CEO of Chrysler in 2007 and we all know how well that's turning out.  Chrysler is a privately held company owned by Cerberus who is begging Washington for MORE money...as if the billions we (and yes i meant to say we) already gave them weren't enough.  Giving Chrysler money really hits a nerve.  Chrysler's parent company isn't willing to invest more money in Chrysler so why are we?

Now, not all CEO's have contracts like Nardelli but it is becoming more common for CEO's and top executives to have their compensation linked to stock performance in the form of options. Does this create an incentive for CEO's to take riskier business decisions in the hope of quickly increasing stock prices to the possible detriment of the companies long term viability?  

New Stock Market Terms

 CEO– Chief Embezzlement Officer
     

 CFO -  Corporate Fraud Officer
     

 BULL MARKET– A random market movement causing an investor to mistake himself for a financial genius

 

 BEAR MARKET– a 6 to 18 month period when the kids gets no allowance, the wife gets no jewelry, and the husband gets no sex.
     

 VALUE INVESTING– The art of buying low and selling lower.
     

P/E RATIO– The percentage of investors wetting their pants as the market keeps crashing.
     

 BROKER – What my financial planner has made me.
     

STANDARD & POOR– Your life in a nutshell.
     

STOCK ANALYST– Idiot who just downgraded your stock.
     

STOCK SPLIT– When your ex-wife and her lawyer split your assets equally between themselves.
     

 MARKET CORRECTION– The day after you buy stocks.
     

 CASH FLOW– The movement your money makes as it disappears down the toilet.
     

YAHOO! – What you yell after selling it to some poor sucker for $240 per share.
     

 WINDOWS– What you jump out of when you're the sucker who bought Yahoo at $240 per share.
     

INSTITUTIONAL INVESTOR– Past year investor who's now locked up in a nuthouse.

   

 PROFIT – an archaic word no longer in use.

 

#     #     #     #     #  
     

 If you had purchased $1000 of shares in Delta Airlines

one year ago, you will have $49.00 today. 

If you had purchased $1000 of shares in AIG

one year ago, you will have $33.00 today. 

If you had purchased $1000 of shares in Lehman Brothers

 one year ago, you will have $0.00 today. 

But---- if you had purchased $1000 worth of beer

one year ago, drank all the beer,

then turned in the aluminum cans for recycling refund,

you will have received $214.00.
     

 Based on the above, the best current investment plan

is to drink heavily & recycle.   

 It's called the   401-Keg.

The Oracle of Omaha

"Rule No. 1:  Never lose money.

Rule No. 2:  Never forget rule No. 1"

Warren Buffet

"It's not necessary to do extraordinary things to get extraordinary results"

Warren Buffet

Warren Buffet is an amazing man often put on a pedestal to be admired by all.  He accumulated great wealth (and kept it) for over a half a century - see rule no. 1.  Off and on he has been he wealthiest man in the world.  In 1953 he convinced a couple friends and family members to invest in his ideas.  I'm sure those original investors never imagined he would be able to grow their small investments into huge fortunes.  He was a young man without much of a track record but people believed in him.  He used basic logic to find valuable companies that were being under valued by the market as a whole.  Why is this important today?  Well, i think the answer to that is pretty obvious.  We are in the midst of a recession where credit is tight.  Almost every company is being negatively affected whether their balance sheet looks good or not.  Personally, I believe the way business was conducted over the last decade and a half with huge leveraged buyouts and cheap borrowing has temporarily come to an end.  Peoples memories are short and it will inevitably return.  But this doesn't change the basic concept that once Americans and the world recovers from this worldwide recession (and it truly is a worldwide recession) certain companies will flourish.  Most major indexes have increased in value over the last half century and i believe that they will continue to increase in value for at least the next century (at least i hope!!!)  

This is where the challenge lies.  How do you find undervalued companies that have been "undeservingly affected" by the recession?  If it were an easy answer everyone would be rich.  But keep in mind that it's not impossible and refer to quote number 2... "It's not necessary to do extraordinary things to get extraordinary results."  

Now is the time to take risks.  Most of my friends don't have a family to take care of or large amounts of debt.  The way i see it, the upside outweighs the risks (classic cost benefit analysis).  Stock prices are currently lower than we have seen them in our lifetime (at least in our semi-adult lifetime).  The goal shouldn't be making a quick buck but finding companies with real value (stay away from financials!) that will still be around and flourishing in the next 5-10 years (or longer if you have the stomach for it).  Don't try to do it alone.  Get some friends involved and put together your own plan.  Multiple minds are often better than one.  

My personal opinions...

1.  Companies that require large expensive capitol equipment are risky.

2.  The Internet is here to stay.  I'm 25; I should be able to see the impact of the Internet better than the 55 year old sitting at a desk trying to analyze where it's going to go and how it's going to be used.  Based on this i like UPS and FedEx, especially since DHL gave up on domestic shipping.  Internet purchases will grow and will pick up once we are out of this recession.  Plus their stocks have been hammered recently.

3.  Oil is a limited resource and will not stay below 40 dollars forever.  I'm not arguing that the 150 price point was justified either, but $30 a barrel will not last much longer.  

4.  Inflation is a big concern.  Printing money has repercussions.  Try to hedge against it.  

BMW does it Again

This is by far one of the coolest concept cars i have ever seen.  BMW calls it their Gina Light Visionary Model.  Why there's no music in the video is beyond me but it's still worth the watch. 

Check out the winking headlights and the transforming dashboard.   

BMW+GINA+Light+Visionary+Model+in+motion

mmmm, Stuffed Peppers

In case there was any doubt as to what Giada looks like, here she is in what looks like a pool of blood.  It's very American Psycho-ish.

Besides the fact that she's probably the most attractive cook on T.V. she also makes some pretty mean Italian food.  Here's a great one from Giada De Laurentiis show Everyday Italian.  This recipe has a Greek influence so it uses mint instead of basil.

If anyone wants to make it for me, let me know!

Ingredients

• 1 (28-ounce) can Italian tomatoes
• 2 zucchini, grated
• 1/2 cup chopped fresh mint leaves
• 1/2 cup grated Pecorino Romano, plus more for sprinkling
• 1/4 cup extra-virgin olive oil
• 3 cloves garlic, minced
• 1 teaspoon salt
• 1 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper
• 4 cups chicken broth
• 1 1/2 cups orzo (rice-shaped pasta)
• 6 sweet bell peppers (red or yellow)

Directions

Preheat the oven to 400 degrees F.

Pour the tomatoes into a large bowl and break apart using a pair of kitchen shears or your finger tips. Add the zucchini, mint, cheese, olive oil, garlic, salt, and pepper. Stir to combine.

Meanwhile, bring the chicken broth to a boil in a medium saucepan over high heat. Add the orzo and cook for 4 minutes. The orzo should be only partially cooked. Use a fine mesh sieve to transfer the orzo to the large bowl with the other vegetables. Stir the orzo into the vegetable mix to combine. Transfer the warm chicken broth to a 3-quart baking dish.

Slice the tops off the peppers and remove all ribs and seeds. Cut a very thin slice from the base to help the peppers stand up.

Place the peppers in the baking dish with the warm chicken broth. Spoon the orzo mixture into the peppers. Cover the dish with foil and bake for 45 minutes. Remove the foil, sprinkle the top of each pepper with cheese and continue baking until the cheese is golden, about 15 minutes. Remove from the oven, carefully transfer the orzo stuffed pepper to a serving plate.

Pu Pu platter

Below is the best pu pu platter reference since the Bloodhound Gangs song, "I wish I was Queer so I could get Chicks."  The song opens with the line, "If your ass is a Chinese restaurant I'll have the poo-poo platter."  

The reference below comes from an ESPN article written by Bill Simmons, the Sports Guy, "NBA trade value rankings, King James version" http://sports.espn.go.com/espn/page2/story?page=simmons/090212

Here's the Pu Pu reference,

" Group J: "Everything Must Go! Everything Must Go!"

36. Amare Stoudemire
Bruce in Phoenix recently begged me, "Can you hold off on the Trade Value column until some GM is dumb enough to offer us too much for Amare? I don't want them to know that he sucks now!" Hey, Bruce? I think they know. Why do you think you're getting so many pu-pu platter offers? It would help if Amare grabbed a rebound or switched correctly on a high screen more than twice per quarter. I still say the Amare era is salvageable -- stick the kid on a team with a good point guard (Chicago?), tell him to just worry about putting the biscuit in the basket (New York? G-State?), or trade for him and say, "We love you, you're our franchise guy" (Sacramento? Memphis? Indiana?) and I think he'd start slapping up 29-9s again. With a smile on his face."

P.S.  This one's for you Brad.  The Lakers Dominate while the Suns want to get rid of Amare...